Shaunta wrote a post on Fierce Fatties about calling out a Facebook friend for posting a fat-shaming picture of a large woman seated at a graduation gathering. This friend did apologize and took the picture down. Other commenters mentioned similar circumstances that they had gone through. For one commenter things did not go nearly as well and her now former friend whose response was to go ballistic and expose her own sources of shame disguised as angry attack.
I had one "friend" who was a member of my nursing class who unfriended me because my links to anti-animal abuse and anti-child abuse organizations and petitions and my frank discussions about living with mental illness were harshing her buzz. She was one of those new-agey people that has to have everything be all sweetness and light all the time. Before anyone gets offended I'm not saying that I have anything against mysticism or the power of positive thinking, or even New Age thought as a whole, but there is a certain segment of New Age thought which postulates that one can never acknowledge negativity or feel anger or depression and I just can't roll with that. I became very tired of shaming myself for the low part of the bipolar cycle--and for buying into the damn fool idea that my low moods were due to "demon possession" or some such nonsense.
I told my now former chum that I would prefer to be mad as hell about the bad things going on and work if only in some small way to change them then to pretend that they don't exist. Oh well. I'd rather not have a "friend" who refuses to accept me as I am, and that includes the dark side. I'd rather never be depressed or angry either, believe me, but that is simply not reality.
Hats off to those who stand behind what they believe. Maybe we can eventually change the world, or at least make it more tolerant for the next generation.
As much as I am for positivity I am also for realism. I do hang with some new age crowds but could never deny illness, either mental or physical.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine de friending anyone for anti child abuse or animal abuse links!!
Well, it's a great way to find out who your real friends are.
ReplyDeleteI believe there is a strain of New Agey-ness that thinks we can all believe whatever we want, as long as it's what they believe.
ReplyDeleteweirsdo
Sassy: Same here. I'm actually not a completely negative person, as it might appear from some of my writing, it's just that my blog is a place to vent and consequently may be more populated by anger than I actually am in person.
ReplyDeleteAmanda: Agreed. Sadly, I've discovered just that a couple of times.
Hobbes/Weirdso: I think the strain is called Visionus Roseus deludica.