Saturday, February 12, 2011

The Lardass Lecture

I guess I inadvertently posted my previous post regarding my weight gain and blood pressure spike at Faycin Facts. You can go there to read it. Here is what I posted at Pam's House Blend in response to her post about body image issues.

I have self-critical thoughts about my body many times a day but try not to indulge the hateful self-talk any more. I don't hate other fat people, why should I be so hateful to myself?
I was not gratified to discover that I'd gained 8 pounds in the space of 2 months, thanks to a great deal of added stress and therefore not giving a shit about watching what I eat. I now weigh 278 pounds. The stereotype "lazy lard-ass" does not apply to me. Nor does it apply to most fat people, in fact. I work, go to school, am trying to clean up after a disastrous water heater leak in my house, mostly by myself. All this added stress has elevated my blood pressure. My BP is normally in the 120's over 70's or 80's. Currently it has shot up to the 150's or 160's over the 80's or 90's. I am not asymptomatic--I have headaches, anxiety, and the constant tinnitus is about to make me choke anyone who pisses me off, I swear! My father had undiagnosed hypertension and ended up having a hemorrhagic stroke in 2004. This started a domino effect of health issues and he died in November of congestive heart failure. So I know I need to go to the doctor and ask for an antihypertensive. As a health care professional I know the one I want to ask for too--the one that has the least side effects and is least likely to tank my heart rate, which seems to be amlodipine. I also know I'm going to get the Lardass Lecture. Thing is, I've been overweight for most of my adult life and have only had hypertension a couple of times--once when the doctor put me on Thyroxine and put me into a state of artificially induced hyperthyroidism--that was hell, I can tell you! And now, when a flip-flopping sleep schedule (working graveyard shifts and doing clinicals on day shifts) and the additional stress of the house repairs have put me into a state where it's impossible to relax.
Wow--sorry for the rant! But as you can see, body image issues can override even health concerns. I'm almost more worried about the Lardass Lecture than about anything I may need to do to temporarily (or permanently) control my hypertension.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thoughtful commentary is welcome. If you are simply a douchebag who wants to spew about how ugly and/or lazy you think fat people are, go drown your worthless ass in a vat of fry grease. Likewise, if you have been brainwashed by the MULTI BILLION DOLLAR diet/weight loss industry and want to preach about what a godsend whatever program your on is, please do so on your own blog. I do not appreciate religious proselytizing, and I do not like proselytizing for The Church of Thinness either. Thanks!

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.